My Husband Duane Leewai  is my poetry, my coffee** and by refilling* my depleted Trust Bank with his guileless, solid transparency, gave me Hope.

Sadly, not even Frida had this [am a fan, she was sui generis but she had sh*tty taste in lovers and this quote is about her yearning, not her reality]

….and I almost didn’t.

I stopped lying to myself. I stopped running away from myself and collided with my present. I get why they call it a gift.

I want for you to experience this. What it feels like to truly not feel alone. Because you are complete within yourself and now you have one other, who is all you need to fill in the perspective that is your viewpoint.

I wanted to have an intimate companion to fill my Trust Bank, but for others it may be a non intimate best friend.

WHY DO WE TAKE ENEMIES INSIDE OURSELVES?

We are programmed to be inti-mates, a source of much pain for so many… especially because so many expect a miracle without being ready for it.

It requires transparency.

How many of you are truly known by another?

*****************

*Women don’t lack Love. Women lack Trust. Women NEED TRUST.

Men are the ones that need Love.

Women love everything even when they are full of hate.

I have broken other women’s trust. I will tell you now it’s because of the sabotage they did first. Doesn’t make it right but that’s how we learn what we are NOT.

I don’t react well to being sabotaged just because I exist, so I took them down by showing them how much they cannot TRUST the males they choose to be their dicks…. because it’s all a façade… it’s all a competition, this disease of wanting to be ‘the best’.

Which is why the sabotage happens.

But you know the adage… if you have to… you ain’t is Sis,

*Duane brews Arabic inspired, spiced coffee every morning. It is is as beautiful and grounded and earthy and aromatic and soothing as replenishing as Him.